{"id":54194,"date":"2022-07-18T13:39:55","date_gmt":"2022-07-18T17:39:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.sogolytics.com\/blog\/?p=54194"},"modified":"2025-07-08T03:57:55","modified_gmt":"2025-07-08T07:57:55","slug":"be-a-better-active-listener","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sogolytics.com\/blog\/be-a-better-active-listener\/","title":{"rendered":"How You Can Be a Better Active Listener\u00a0"},"content":{"rendered":"

Odds are you\u2019ve had someone say, \u201cyou\u2019re not listening to me!\u201d You may protest that you were<\/em> listening, of course you were! But were you actively listening? That\u2019s more challenging. Yet this intentional listening technique can have a positive impact on your professional and personal relationships. Read on to learn some strategies that will help you be a better active listener.<\/p>\n

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What type of listener are you?<\/h2>\n

There are three levels of listening<\/a> that we can engage in during interactions with others. First, there\u2019s internal listening<\/strong>. This is what most of us do. When we\u2019re listening to someone else, what we\u2019re really focused on is formulating our response. This gets in the way of our information gathering and understanding of what the speaker intends to convey.<\/p>\n

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A step up from this is focused listening<\/strong>. In this case, the listener pays attention and makes an effort to block out distractions. You are aware of your inner voice, but working to focus instead on the speaker. You might think of the listening you do in a meeting with your boss. You listen intently because you want to do the right thing. Still, you\u2019re not quite at active listening.<\/p>\n

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The third level of listening is active listening<\/strong>, sometimes also called global listening. This is when you are truly\u00a0listening to understand<\/a>. This is intentional listening at its best. You are noticing non-verbal cues (e.g. tone, emotions, body language, and reluctance to share information). You are reflecting on what the other person means to say, as well as what they actually say.<\/p>\n

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Strategies to be a better active listener<\/h2>\n

Active listening may not be our natural inclination, but it can be learned. Since it offers so many personal and professional advantages, it\u2019s worth putting in the effort. Try using these strategies to improve your active listening:<\/p>\n

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Remove Distractions<\/strong><\/p>\n

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There are many ways to do this. Put your devices down. Silence notifications on your computer. Turn to face the speaker. Maintain eye contact and resist the impulse to scan the room or fiddle with paper clips or a coffee mug. The goal is to signal to the person speaking that you are ready to give them your full attention.<\/p>\n

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Be Patient<\/strong><\/p>\n

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When you are anticipating what the other person is going to say or preparing your response in your head, you aren\u2019t being patient. Active listening requires you to focus your attention on the other individual\u2019s words, body language and other non-verbal cues. The person speaking may not speak as concisely or directly as you would like, but barking \u201cget to the point\u201d at them is not going to help them feel heard.<\/p>\n

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Remain Neutral<\/strong><\/p>\n

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To be a better active listener you\u2019ll need to learn to let your preconceived notions go. You may think you know what the other person is going to say, but that doesn\u2019t mean that you do. Keep an open mind<\/a> and be willing to listen and adjust.<\/p>\n

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Invest your time and attention in this particular conversation while trying to avoid being judgmental. Even if you disagree, wait for the speaker to finish talking or come to an appropriate break to share your perspective. Actively try to at least understand the other person\u2019s point of view.<\/p>\n

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Summarize and Paraphrase<\/strong><\/p>\n

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There are some key differences between summarizing and paraphrasing<\/a> to consider: \u201cParaphrasing involves rephrasing the speakers\u2019 words – this could be along the lines of \u2018In other words, what you are saying is\u2026\u2019 or \u2018you are frustrated\/struggling\/happy with XXX because\u2026\u2019, whereas summarizing requires the listener to either repeat an overview of the conversation, or to reiterate the main points back to the speaker, allowing them to respond and clarify if required.\u201d<\/p>\n

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Nevertheless, both can be useful in confirming that you have heard what the speaker has communicated and helping them feel their words are valued.<\/p>\n

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Be Aware of Non-Verbal Feedback<\/strong><\/p>\n

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If you\u2019re rolling your eyes or tapping a pen impatiently on the table, the speaker isn\u2019t going to feel you are listening effectively. Just as active listeners are alert to the speaker\u2019s non-verbal cues, pay attention to what your own body language, tone, or emotion might be saying to the speaker as you listen.<\/p>\n

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Ask Open-Ended Questions<\/strong><\/p>\n

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Questions can help you to clarify what the speaker is saying. They can also signal your willingness to hear what the other person is trying to communicate. However, you\u2019ll want to avoid using yes\/no questions. Also, steer clear of leading questions, or ones that steer the conversation away from the original topic.<\/p>\n

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Try to ask\u00a0open-ended questions<\/a> that encourage elaboration, such as:<\/p>\n